This is my story, and it is true...I keep telling this one from time to time...
...years back after having left an apartment dwelling for single home dwelling, I had spent the morning scouring the apartment for loose change, bits and pieces, spare cans of food, broken lamps and pillows....
I went to work. I got off at 11:30 PM. I drove south down Route 13. There is a long stretch of road between a few stores and Odessa. There was a large truck on the right hand side. We were both apace, neither passing or falling behind. Doing the speed limit. There's a turn to be had at the left hand side, so I saw no point in getting in front of the truck.
And a car comes speeding up. It was directly in back of me. The headlights were not synchronized.
It begins to flash the high beams. That action caught me in the eye. The high beams are flashed again. And again.
I put up my middle digit and shook it. The high beams went up again.
A few seconds later the familiar red and blue baby lights go on, along with a siren.
I slow down, and allow the truck to get ahead. I pull over. I get out of the car. It is January. The policeman is a tall 6 foot plus. He approaches me and his palm smacks into my chest and his fingers curl slightly, and turn. He dropped the attempting fist.
Not winking an eye, or flinching I ask, "Is there anything you want?
"Yeah," he said "I wanna know why you flipped me, gave me the sign." He walks around my car, flashlight peering into the back seat, illuminating junk and cans and old clothing.
"Well, what do you want?" I gave him my ID. He held onto it.
"Why'd you give me the finger? Why'd you give me the finger?"
"I wasn't speeding. The truck wouldn't let me in. And you raced up on my tail and flashed your beams."
Mr Tall and Tenor was also attempting a pale mustache. I'm sure my facial hair left him at a loss.
Still looking into the contents of my car, he asked, "What would you have done if that was your mother driving behind you?" He turned and faced me.
"I'm sure my mother would understand it if I was pointing out bad behavior and bad driving."
"Okay." A deep breath. " Now what if, what if it was a granny lady with six babies in the back seat..."
I said nothing. He went from possible to highly hypothetical. He glared at me. "I wish I could find something to arrest you for."
I got my ID back. He said "I got a drunk it there for testing. You're wasting my time."
I didn't bother to fill out a change of address for a month.
I told this story often. It caused my son to fail his driving course. Leo had mentioned this and another story about Giani being stopped by a policeman who uttered the words, "We're sure you're the one who was speeding." (I didn't bring up the time policemen held me at gunpoint.) The charge was dismissed.
So Leo told these stories to his driving Teacher at school. She was not amused. She was trying to imply in the course that "The police are your friends". Of course, Leo only found out later that her husband is a State Trooper.
Labels: Bay of Pigs, Policemen are our Friends, Six foot Oinker