SALVAGING THE RETURN OF THE JEDI

In the DVD Compilation of ROBOT CHICKEN , there’s a small snippet of Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader hashing out the plot line of the series. One of them was “Ewoks are going to bring down the Empire?”

Let’s just say they probably were an indication that things from then on would stink for STAR WARS.

To begin with they’re cute. Bad sign. They’re marketable. Art and commerce clash here.

Logically, if they were that fuzzy, the wouldn’t want to wear armor.

My view: delete them from the movie and reshoot the Ewok sequences with human children, with a side story that when the Empire came to plant themselves, they killed all adults and left the children to starve.

And when the Jedi come to the planet they rally themselves and search the rubble for items to help bring down the Empire.

Far more satisfying to imagine kids doing this than hamsters with a gland problem.

Oh yes, I did a review of the EWOK movie on Amazon.com. I’m hoping for a movie called PREDATOR MEETS EWOKS, so I can root for the Predator.