persona non sequitur

a review of media by a slightly jaded baby boomer.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

REJECTED MOVIE SCRIPT IDEAS:

STAR TREK: THE GERIATRIC GENERATION. Cast is pretty much the same as the first movie--Shatner will play Kirk, and the plot is centered around an Intergalactic Retirement home which looks an awful lot like the Enterprise, or at least, recycled sets. Most of the crew have motorized wheelchairs. Scotty raises drunken Tribbles. Kirk dreams of Hormones. Bones seeks the Fountain of Youth. A small alien boy tries to get them to play "kick the can". Kirk accepts this idea, quoting ...from Shakespeare...excessively, and Spock refuses to play, calling it all "illogical".

HONEY I FREEZE DRIED THE CHILDREN

A joint sequel to ALIENS and GREMLINS. Aliens land in New York City and live in the subway system and began snacking on the homeless. Gizmo gets a face hugger and falls into a tank intended for Lobsters at 11:55 PM in a deserted supermarket. A few thousand gremlins emerge and go after the aliens. Climatic scene takes place in the United Nations where aliens and Gremlins and members of the UN fight it out in the grand council chambers. (What's with the rejection slip that says: "Go take a hike?" To where..?)

Stephen King was less than enthusiastic for the proposed idea that would be STEPHEN KING'S FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER by EDGAR ALLEN POE directed by Roger Corman idea. He didn't think my idea for his novelising the movie THE LAWNMOWER MAN was too cool either.

AWAKENINGS II: Herbert West.

BORED OF THE RINGS directed by Peter Jackson. Why not?




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